Life is a Mosaic

7 Tips on Reintegration

It`s been 3 months I'm back home. I cannot say I'm integrated into my life in Lithuania, and I guess it will never be the same anyway. But here are some key things that have been useful tips from my friends, or the things that I`ve discovered myself.

1. Reintegration doesn't happen by itself. It's a choice, to start doing things one used to do long time ago. Maybe differently, maybe better.

2. Connect. I was lucky to have my best friends still around. They always stay, no matter how far you are or how bad you are with keeping in touch (I am so not perfect in that). The thing is that they have their lives, their routines, where I was taking up only maybe a few e-mail exchanges and phone calls. So I had to be proactive to get myself back into their lives. And getting to know some more people, as well.

3. Do something. Anything. It`s easy to sleep long hours as you don`t need to go to work anymore, and you don`t even know what to do. And it`s your hometown, where you know everything, and it is kinda boring. Easy way to get into gray mood. After a short break I've started to put some discipline into my free time, getting done some things I thought of doing, but never had the time. Getting up at 7, excercise, read newspapers with a coffee cup, checking e-mails, organising some appointments, reading books, sketching, sorting pictures and my music collection, cleaning the house, meeting my friends and relaxing and enjoying life... geez, why didn`t I do this before?

4. Get a job. It's kind of an aiesec'y thing to have a long term vision of your life and take steps which are in-line with this direction. However, sometimes when environment changes rapidly, not everyone manages to stay sure about his/her direction. Experience abroad is indeed a life-changing experience :) I could get a part time brainless job which would not tie me to anything and I could leave anytime I decide what I really want to do. For some people it works, just taking a time off, paying the bills and putting off a decision for later. For me it doesn't, so my job will be a little bit more demanding. Maybe it won`t take me exactly where I want to be in 15 years, but I will stretch me so, that I can use that anywhere I move next. I have to identofy myself with my job at least to a certain extent.

6. Be ready to explain yourself. I have realized how many of the decisions I've made are different from the ones that my environment expects. When I say to my middle aged neighbour that I was working abroad, they start guessing - "Oh you also? Which one - UK or Ireland? What did you do - waitressing or you got an office job? If life is so good there, why didn`t you stay?". This is a reflection fo general trends in Eastern Europe, but I was never part of a trend.

5. Make time for family. Since my siblings have little children and they grow very fast, it was getting to know part of my family again. However, it`s still the most stable thing that changed only slightly throughout all 20 months I was away. It's a nice escape, and it help to look at old issues in a new way.

6. Keep the memories alive, but not live in the memories. I have missed so many things from the life I used to have in Be and Nl. But they say, if you look at the closed door for too long, you don`t see the other door opening. I watch my pictures from all my trips and stays abroad, i stay in touch with friends, and I keep up with some habits I used to have there. But I live in Lt and this is another good life;)

7. Don't forget to fly. I have not done traveling. I still have many ideas to work on and more to discover. It may look like I am settling, but I am always settling wherever I go. I have to take my ideas to the next level, and I chose to do it in my country. It`s true, often people start to settle and they bury some dreams they had long time ago. Some of them regret doing so. Some of them don`t because they realize that settling down was actually the thing they needed, it was their "flying". I have never regretted a single step I took, so it`s all good.

Labels: Musings, Reintegration

posted by Vija @ 4:50 PM